Amuse Bouche

Soap clicked his fingers and called for the coats, his voice somehow able to compete with the string quartet’s crescendo. The maître d’ approached tentatively. His voice, when he was within earshot.. was honey; too sweet to be wholesome.

“And how would sir wish to settle the bill tonight?”

“He wouldn’t,” Soap said.

“I don’t quite follow. Is it the lady’s treat, perhaps?”

“No.” Soap puffed his chest.”The food was atrocious and the wine was mediocre. You phoney bastards don’t deserve a dime.”

“Sir, if there’s been—“

“This isn’t a negotiation, pal. Chalk it up to customer dissatisfaction and step aside."

“Surely there is some way we can settle this amicably?”

….

“Yeah, you can get the fuck out of my way, and put a little more effort in next time.”

from Disorder by Gerard Brennan (2018). Very Highly Recommended.